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Hanya karena hal sepele aku bertengkar dengan Mama dan kabur dari rumah. Aku pergi ke tempat kos yang aku tinggali. Aku terus di sana tanpa kabar. Papaku mengirimiku pesan bertubi tapi aku berbohong dengan mengatakan aku menghadiri rapat OSIS.
Tiga hari kemudian, tepatnya tanggal 13 Juni 2019, aku pulang karena terus merasa bersalah. Mama masih tidak mau bicara padaku. Aku masih tidak meminta maaf sampai keesokan harinya, Papa menyuruhku untuk minta maaf kepada Mama. Aku memberanikan diri meminta maaf sore harinya, dan mama memaafkanku. Setelahnya, kehidupan berjalan seperti biasa.
Tanggal 22 Juni 2019. Aku memainkan ponselku di ruang TV. Saat itu Mama sedang memotong kain untuk mengerjakan pesanan jahitannya ketika setelahnya, Mama merasakan tangan kirinya sakit. Seperti kesemutan, katanya dan mengaggap itu adalah hal yang biasa. Ia lalu memutuskan menyelesaikan pekerjaannya. Malam harinya, tangan kirinya masih sakit dan berbaring di kamar. Namun beberapa jam setelahnya, ia mengatakan tangannya sudah sembuh. Pun esoknya, ia bahkan mengangkat tumpukan piring untuk membantu acara syukuran di rumah. Tak ada yang menyangka, bahwa kejadian itulah awal mula dari kemunculan penyakit ganas yang menyebabkan kematian Mama.
Harusnya, aku harus pergi ke sekolah tanggal 17 bulan itu karena hari libur sudah berakhir. Namun, karena hari libur akan dilanjut satu minggu setelahnya, aku memutuskan untuk bolos karena pikirku pasti berangkat sekolah saat itu hanya menghabiskan waktu. Mama dan Papa sempat mengajakku ke kos yang terletak di kota, tapi aku menolak dengan alasan nanti saja masuk sekolahnya. Mama dan Papa akhirnya pergi berdua ke kota untuk berjalan-jalan. Malamnya, aku pergi ke minimarket dekat rumah dengan adikku.
Sesampainya di rumah kembali, kulihat mobil sudah terparkir menandakan kedua orang tuaku sudah pulang. Aku pun memasuki rumah dan memainkan ponsel di ruang TV. Papa saat itu berkata bahwa tangan Mama kembali sakit seperti dua hari yang lalu, tapi aku hanya menganggap itu hanyalah sakit biasa mengingat sakit itu hilang dengan cepat sebelumnya. Kali ini, sakitnya menimpa tangan kanan, bukan tangan kiri.
Saat itu kondisi tangan Mama makin parah beberapa jam kemudian. Ia bahkan hanya bisa berbaring lemah di atas kasurnya. Aku berpikir bahwa itu hanyalah kerusakan saraf kecil di tangannya karena terlalu giat menjahit. Malam itu pukul 9, dengan ditemani aku, Papa, dan dua Bibiku, Mama memutuskan untuk ke rumah sakit.
Perjalanan menghabiskan waktu tidak lebih dari satu jam. Mama langsung dilarikan ke IGD. Aku melihat Mama yang terbaring di atas ranjang IGD, matanya tertutup sambil terlihat menahan sakit. Aku tidak menyangka akan separah ini. Aku dan yang lainnya menunggu di sana selama 15 menit, sampai kemudian seorang dokter wanita datang dan menusuk jarum suntuk ke tangan mama. “Kemungkinan stroke,” ungkapnya singkat. Mama sudah tidak sadarkan diri.
Stroke, penyakit yang tak pernah kupikirkan akan menimpa mama sebelumnya.
Aku merasakan pusing dan mual setelahnya. Akhirnya, Papa memutuskan mengantarkanku pulang. Mama dijaga oleh dua Bibiku dan dikabarkan sudah memasuki ICU. Aku meninggalkan rumah sakit dengan perasaan hancur. Tak terhitung berapa air mata yang sudah menetes kala itu.
Esoknya, aku kembali mengunjungi rumah sakit, kali ini bersama beberapa keluarga besar. Mama sudah dikonfirmasi mengalami stroke, pembuluh darah otak sebelah kirinya pecah dan ia akan melakukan operasi sore harinya. Aku memasuki ruang HCU tempat mama berada. Matanya masih tertutup. Dokter mengatakan kesadarannya kurang dari 50%, yang artinya ia tidak mengenali orang-orang di sekitarnya.
Malamnya, Mama selesai di operasi. Para pengunjung baru boleh membesuk sekitar jam 10 malam. Mama dipidahkan ke ruang ICU dan matanya masih tertutup, bahkan sampai 3 hari setelahnya. Dokter mengatakan itu adalah pengaruh obat bius agar Mama dapat lebih lama beristirahat. Ia kini tidak mempunyai sehelai rambut pun, tapi tetap terlihat cantik di mataku.
Tanggal 22 Juni 2019, Mama sudah sadar dan sudah banyak bergerak. Ia bisa mengenaliku dan orang-orang di sekitar, namun belum bisa bicara. Esok malamnya, Mama dipindahkan ke ruang rawat inap biasa karena keadaannya yang makin membaik. Mama sudah mengeluarkan suaranya sepatah dua patah kata, namun tidak terdengar jelas karena masih dalam tahap pemulihan.
Ulang tahunku tanggal 28 Juni, namun aku tidak mengharapkan apa-apa selain kesembuhan mama. Mama sudah bertambah baik kala itu. Aku ikut menjaga mama di rumah sakit malam harinya, bersama kedua Bibiku. Semuanya berjalan normal, Mama beranjak tidur dan menyuruh untuk mematikan lampu dan televisi, walau kita sempat kebingungan karena bahasa mama yang belum bisa dimengerti. Semua tenang sampai suatu ketika, tengah malam, Mama bergerak tak karuan. Busa mengalir dari mulutnya tak kunjung berhenti. Awalnya, kami mengira itu hanyalah muntahan biasa akibat ia yang aktif makan siang harinya. Namun, keadaan mama tak kunjung membaik sampai satu jam kemudian. Suster memutuskan memberikan obat penenang agar Mama bisa tenang.
Aku bangun kesiangan esoknya, sepertinya jam 10 kala itu. Pasti karena malamnya aku tidur sangat larut. Aku beranjak ke kamar mandi untuk mandi dan membeli sarapan setelahnya. Mama masih tertidur, mungkin efek semalam. Namun, Mama tak kunjung bangun sampai jam 12 siang tiba, bahkan ketika dokter mengguncang tubuhnya dengan cukup keras.
Akhirnya, Mama dipindahkan ke ruang HCU kembali karena sepertinya ada yang tidak beres, begitu kata dokter. Kami akhirnya membawa semua barang-barang kembali ke ruang tunggu. Hasil pemeriksaan baru keluar malamnya, tebak apa? Kali ini, pembuluh darah otak sebelah kanannya pecah. Mama masih belum sadarkan diri, dan mengalami fase kritis. Aku masih memiliki harapan waktu itu. Lihat saja, dalam film-film atau drama Korea, banyak, kok, kisah pemeran utama yang kritis namun akhirnya sadar kembali dan bisa kembali sehat seperti sebelumnya. Aku yakin Mama pun bisa kembali sehat.
Hari itu, tanggal 30 Juni 2019. Jam besuk sudah ICU sudah dibuka, pasien diperbolehkan menjenguk. Mama dipindahkan ke ruang ICU karena kondisinya tambah parah. Aku melihat Mama, terbaring lemah kala itu dan tidak tahu kapan ia akan membuka matanya.
Siangnya, keluarga memutuskan mengikhlaskan Mama. Hari minggu, 30 Juni 2019 tepat pukul 5 sore WIB, alat bantu yang membantu Mama hidup selama ini dilepas. Napasnya menghilang perlahan-lahan sampai akhirnya, Mama benar-benar sudah tiada.
Sudah lima bulan berlalu. Sampai hari ini, tak ada hari tanpa mengingatnya. Mimpi akan Mama yang masih hidup pun menghantuiku setiap harinya. Aku membuka WhatsApp darinya setiap hari, berharap Mama akan menanyakan lagi kabarku, apa yang sedang kulakukan, namun itu mustahil.
Selamat jalan, Ma. Di sini, kami mengikhlaskanmu dan (berusaha) akan baik-baik saja~
Sumber:hipwee.com
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